Friday, 6 July 2012

Post the first - what am I doing here?

Ohai! Well, in answer to the above, I should say that I haven't quite decided yet. It just seemed like everyone else had a blog, so I wanted one too. There's no theme here, though. No subject of particular interest. It's just a look inside my head. It seems only fair, after all, to give the rest of the world the chance to marvel at the crystalline caverns of my astonishing mind. Some days it might be venting spleen like Mount Vesuvius with a staggering case of heartburn; others it might be gently wafting zephyrs of cogitation across the pretty flowers and burgeoning crops of my little garden. Basically I'll be sharing whatever goes through my head. This is unlikely to be of interest to the Powers That Be; or to change the world in any way; but you never know and so I shall begin...

My name is Joan. I live in Glasgow, which is in many respects a wonderful town. Not THE Wonderful Town, obviously, but Glasgow has a character and personality all its own. It's like a big, good-natured, straight-talking, hard-living bon vivant with a heart of gold, a wealth of slightly blue jokes and an endless supply of fabulous stories. The kind of guy you sometimes bump into on family occasions- he's usually someone's uncle or something - who you end up having a brilliant night with despite initially thinking 'Oh God please don't let him come over and talk to me'. It's not a beautiful town, although there are some incredibly beautiful bits; and it's not without its problems - but hey, where isn't? So if you look past the neds* and the jakies** and ignore the wee hairies*** pushing prams around the town centre, Glasgow's a great place to live.

What else do you need to know about me? I'm lucky enough to have a great family life and a respectable number of incredible friends. I work in media and communications and largely hate it. I have a rich and varied range of likes and dislikes, but I won't say more here or there will only be one post on this blog and it will be eight million words long. I have all my own hair and what teeth are left are also mine. No pets, not even a goldfish because I get terribly upset when they inevitably leave me, especially when they pretend to be dead all day then suddenly spring back into life just as I hit the flush. I'm horribly afraid of spiders but am working on it and I don't like okrah.

Oh, and I like frogs. I don't know why. It's just something about their slightly serene, slightly thoughtful expressions. Seriously. Look at this picture of a frog and tell me I'm wrong.

He's planning something, isn't he?

OK, that'll do for post #1. If you've enjoyed it, come back for post #2. If not - well, just don't come back. Some life decisions  are very simple.

*non-Glaswegians: think reincarnated seagulls wearing shellsuit trousers and skip caps so far back on their heads they look like they're stapled on. Usually found swigging 'Buckie' and swaggering down the centre of any particularly busy road, especially if there are buses thundering along it at 50mph. Also noted for an inability to pronounce consonants.

**this time think reincarnated pigeons. Especially the ones with the stumpy feet. That's it.  

***Female chavs

1 comment:

  1. Wahay!! An insight into the life of Joan. I look forward to receiving updates from the cosmic genius that is your mind. Less o the long words though eh babes...mind I'm fae Wishay!! Love it!!!